Here I Lay My Ebenezer

As many of you know, I met David in Matamoros, Mexico, where we worked together as part of a team of eight young Americans with a great family in Mexico in their ministry there. While working alongside him, I noticed that David's Bible's margins were often marked with dates in the margins next to verses or chapters. The Bible is "living and active," according to Hebrews 4:12; when reading through chapters or verses, the Spirit of God may use the words powerfully to alter the pattern of our lives in ways both great and small. In David's case, when he would encounter such experiences, he would write the date in the margin as a reminder and encouragement to himself in the future - in essence, laying an Ebenezer.

Throughout the history of the Christian faith and back into Judaism, there is a tradition of marking out moments where God has worked or made himself known to his people. Probably the most well known is that of the Ebenezer stone. The nation of Israel was approaching battle with the Philistines, a mighty neighboring nation; the Israelites and the prophet Samuel cried out to the LORD, and 1 Samuel 7:10 reads, "...that day the LORD thundered with loud thunder against the Philistines and threw them into such a panic that they were routed before the Israelites." In verse 12, to commemorate this moment, "Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen. He named it Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far has the LORD helped us."

I find great value in documenting our spiritual history with "Ebenezers," even if they are just dates in the margins and not giant stones. Having been inspired by David's habit, I, too, began marking out key moments, and now I find myself greatly encouraged to be reading along and reminded of God's work in my life through certain passages. For example, when reading in Isaiah, I am reminded that in November 2003 (while in Mexico) God increasingly drew my attention to Isaiah 58, in which He calls His people to meet the needs of some the most vulnerable in society- the hungry, the homeless, the oppressed. Through this and other verses, my path was shaped so that in 2007 I decided to not pursue my previous career plans and instead to divert to social work.

Again, in 2004 when things worked out quickly and beautifully so that David and I could be married in August, I marked Psalm 16:5-6...The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot. The lines have fallen for mein pleasant places; indeed, I have a beatuiful inheritance." Several times the Spirit of God has drawn me to verses like Psalm 4: 4 "Be angry and do not sin" to direct my immediate actions (or point out that the actions I chose were wide of the target, to say the least), or I have marked passages like 1 Corinthians 2:11-16, where I read and understood something new and wonderful. And this past year (and the one before as well, truthfully), I have been deeply attracted to the truths of Proverbs, though it took the full two years- at least- to begin to really grasp the full implications for my life of Proverbs 19:21, "Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand."

The point of all this? The point is...it's my birthday! While that might not be the obvious conclusion to draw from the paragraphs above, it is why I've written it all. In recent years I have found birthdays, as well as other major occasions, to be perfect opportunities to seek direction from the LORD for the coming year. I love reading what God has done in the past, and something about a birthday causes people, myself included, to become reflective about what has been and possibly considerate of what may become. This week I have hit on a verse that resonated in such a way as to make it inevitable that I'll be returning to it over and over in the coming days, whether it be for the whole of my 26th year or not.

"I therefore...urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace (Eph 4:1-3). I like the calling to walk in a worthy manner, as it implies walking with purpose and knowing to what we have been called. The rest of the verse- humility, gentleness, patience... I will just say, it will be a learning year, and very likely, a learning lifetime. In the words of Robert Robinson: "here I lay my Ebenezer, hither by Thy help I come." (From the 1758 hymn, Come Thou Fount).

Best Chocolate Chip Cookies, Really.

When I was young, my sisters and I would stand on stools next to my mom and perform such critical chocolate chip cooking baking tasks as sifting the flour (which you may note, is not actually a part of this recipe...) and greasing the cookie sheet. For every classroom birthday (where you get to bring in treats to school on your birthday)...I would bring in oatmeal cookies; usually, I assisted in making these, meaning they came in to school as somewhat lumpy, often smashed, versions of the original. Whenever I returned home from college for any reason...oatmeal cookies were waiting on the counter. And, when I was in Mexico, my mom made these cookies in large quanities, froze them, and sent them down as a taste from home. I have a long, wonderful history with these cookies and intend to eat them forever. I have decided to post this recipe for your eating enjoyment, should anyone else also want to eat them forever.

Since I use so many choc chips, I have cut the sugar significantly...if you are sparse on chips (or substitute with nuts), you may want to compensate with 1/4c more white and brown sugar (each).

Chocolate Chip Oatmeal Cookies

1/2c veg shortening
1/2c margarine (or butter, if you want a butter flavor)
2 eggs
-mix above ingredients and beat smooth-
2.5 c oats
1/4-1/3 c white sugar
1/4 c brown sugar
1 t vanilla
1t baking soda mixed in 1T hot water
-Mix all well-
1.25c flour
1t salt
-Mix all very briefly-
LOTS of choc chips. Usually one full small bag of semisweet, but just add what looks good to you.
-Mix, and eat dough (beware salmonella and other raw-egg dangers...this is my disclaimer)
- Grease cookie sheet and bake at 350 approx 12 minutes (or at 375 for less time....still turn out well). They should be about to brown, but not browning yet.

Yum! They freeze wonderfully, so make a double batch for twice the eating pleasure.

Choosing My Blessings

I find the nature of human connectedness to be fascinating, which is probably why I went into psychology and then social work. We are created in the image of God who is perpetually in perfect relationship, as God the Father, God the Spirit, and God the Son are one and yet three; the Son does the will of the Father, the Spirit empowers us to conform to the Son...and so on. Besides being in perfect relationship with himself, God has chosen to enter into relationship with such dysfunctional individuals as all of us; we are unfaithful, yet He is faithful. We are changeful and erratic, he is unchanging from before the foundation of the world.

All this seems to indicate that since we are made in the image of a relational God, people are inherently relational, though admittedly some are more skilled in this arena than others. We thrive amidst healthy family and friendship relationships, and we seem to have an incredible resilience for surviving and recovering from poor, dysfunctional relationships. Scientifically, those who are likely to do worst are the children deprived of almost any kind of relationship during the first years of life, which is a pretty strong statement about our relation-ality.

In my own life, I clearly recognize the reality that I'm created for relationships, although I would always prefer a few good friends over many. And, I have lately become grateful for a fact that has long frustrated me in terms of friendships. Inevitably, as I move around, I make and leave friends, meaning that most of my closest friends and family will live states away at any given moment (enhanced by the fact that I seem to befriend or be related to people who are themselves rather transient. It is a great consolation to me that my husband is somewhat obligated to live with me, meaning I usually have my favorite friend nearby).

While distance is terribly inconvenient on a Friday night, I am finding it incredibly reassuring in this stage of life. I know two people in my new town (the two neighbors who seem to spend more time outside their homes than in them), but I don't feel cut off or isolated, as my network of friends is largely maintained by technology, such as the phone and blogs, rather than face-to-face time. As a result, this important contributor to my quality of life - having a few close friends -has become almost completely detached from my geographical location, which has freed me up to hold loosely to the places we land, leaving me happy to arrive and willing to go.

I still find it strange, on occasion, to feel both very unknown locally and yet also well-known (rather than isolated) at the same time, but I have come to view the distance separating me from friends as one of those blessings I would never ask for, but in the end, am happy to receive from a God who clearly cares for me. I would never ask to suffer, yet usually emerge more mature and sympathic to/aware of others' needs; I don't usually ask for hard work, yet I find I can be proud of the outcome after such times.

Similarly, I've never asked the Lord for long-distance friendships, yet I find again that it's a case of me receiving a blessing I would never have had the foresight to request, highlighting again the truth of Isaiah 55:9 "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my [the Lord's] ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts higher than your thoughts..." Thank goodness I don't really run my life, nor choose my blessings.

Settled

Today I realized: we really live here. The boxes are not only unpacked, but we have left behind the nearly constant conversation that begins, "Where is the...?" or "Have you seen...?" or "Where do you keep...?" We know where things live in our house, and somewhere along the way, it began to feel very, very normal that we live here, too. Actually, it is THRILLING to live here, as we have central airconditioning (David's favorite part) and a garbage disposal (my favorite part). Seriously- those are two very unglamorous components to this place, but when you have lived without them, you get it. I am really grateful for God's provision with this place. A month and a half ago I was facing a choice between moving into an apartment that had cigarette butts all over the floor (to disguise the stains, I think) or the one with the stinky carpet, and the Lord straightened it all out in lovely fashion. Praise God!

While I was getting ready for the move, I was completely focused on the move. Right after, I began to really focus on employment after the move...particularly the part where the master's student goes to work at Applebee's or Walmart or some other job that bears exactly zero relationship to all this studying I've been doing. Since that realization, when CareerBuilder turned up exactly two jobs in social work in my area...neither of which I am remotely qualified to do (think executive director), I have started praying for employment that makes the last two years seem worth it. Thankfully, a door seems to be opening there, as well. This fall, I've decided to do contracted work for whatever nonprofits will hire me while I finish my degree. Also, I'm researching, reading, and sharpening my grant-writing skills so that after GRADUATING in December (obviously, that word is very exciting to me), I can hopefully establish myself in some good old-fashioned self-employment as a grant-writer. This is basically research and writing, from home, about social issues and programs, to help people in need. Aka, my dream job. I'm really hoping this works out. Even if it doesn't work out, I have hope in the meantime, which is certainly worth something!

Previous Posts

Previous posts are available in facebook notes. I decided only to re-load those posts from the last few months.