Choosing My Blessings

I find the nature of human connectedness to be fascinating, which is probably why I went into psychology and then social work. We are created in the image of God who is perpetually in perfect relationship, as God the Father, God the Spirit, and God the Son are one and yet three; the Son does the will of the Father, the Spirit empowers us to conform to the Son...and so on. Besides being in perfect relationship with himself, God has chosen to enter into relationship with such dysfunctional individuals as all of us; we are unfaithful, yet He is faithful. We are changeful and erratic, he is unchanging from before the foundation of the world.

All this seems to indicate that since we are made in the image of a relational God, people are inherently relational, though admittedly some are more skilled in this arena than others. We thrive amidst healthy family and friendship relationships, and we seem to have an incredible resilience for surviving and recovering from poor, dysfunctional relationships. Scientifically, those who are likely to do worst are the children deprived of almost any kind of relationship during the first years of life, which is a pretty strong statement about our relation-ality.

In my own life, I clearly recognize the reality that I'm created for relationships, although I would always prefer a few good friends over many. And, I have lately become grateful for a fact that has long frustrated me in terms of friendships. Inevitably, as I move around, I make and leave friends, meaning that most of my closest friends and family will live states away at any given moment (enhanced by the fact that I seem to befriend or be related to people who are themselves rather transient. It is a great consolation to me that my husband is somewhat obligated to live with me, meaning I usually have my favorite friend nearby).

While distance is terribly inconvenient on a Friday night, I am finding it incredibly reassuring in this stage of life. I know two people in my new town (the two neighbors who seem to spend more time outside their homes than in them), but I don't feel cut off or isolated, as my network of friends is largely maintained by technology, such as the phone and blogs, rather than face-to-face time. As a result, this important contributor to my quality of life - having a few close friends -has become almost completely detached from my geographical location, which has freed me up to hold loosely to the places we land, leaving me happy to arrive and willing to go.

I still find it strange, on occasion, to feel both very unknown locally and yet also well-known (rather than isolated) at the same time, but I have come to view the distance separating me from friends as one of those blessings I would never ask for, but in the end, am happy to receive from a God who clearly cares for me. I would never ask to suffer, yet usually emerge more mature and sympathic to/aware of others' needs; I don't usually ask for hard work, yet I find I can be proud of the outcome after such times.

Similarly, I've never asked the Lord for long-distance friendships, yet I find again that it's a case of me receiving a blessing I would never have had the foresight to request, highlighting again the truth of Isaiah 55:9 "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my [the Lord's] ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts higher than your thoughts..." Thank goodness I don't really run my life, nor choose my blessings.